Raid Is Not Air Freshener

My mother can never  get the concept of poison through her head.  She sprays a bottle of Raid around the house as if it's a damn air freshener even though we always tell her dude it's freaking poison so quit it!  I mean I know anyone would love to have a layer of Raid as a topping over their meals and don't forget a nice layer of Raid to protect your feet from the rough surfaces of the floor.  Also, we can't forget the household pets too!  They really enjoy licking the tasteful delight off the floor because it's just so darn delicious and nutritious!

Trust him, he's a doctor!

Where's Mommy?

Perhaps I am the worst kid ever or perhaps I just really don't care where my parents are because they're grown ups so they can take care of themselves without me having the need to pester them to find out their whereabouts.  I could never figure out where my parents would be because they're always on the move from place to place and they come and go all the time.  Everyone is always in a rush so there's no time to ask the simple questions.  I think I should just implant a gps tracking chip in them so I can track them down without the hassle of talking to them.  I'm sure tracking chips on humans are commercialized nowadays because if you can implant chips on your pets then why not humans too?  Bring the hobo you found on the streets to a local vet to see who the bum belongs to! 

He gots a used mommy

Your Mom

It has never really occured to me but most languages are actually interchangeable in terms of sayings.  For example, in english when you feel like insulting someone that's is utterly a noob you would shout "Your mama" as in the said person's mama is a "Insert an insult here please."  You can say the same in another language as well and it would be the same insult rather than some other freaking meaning.  Your mom would always mean your mom no matter what language you translate it to.  That's right, your mom!

Momma nooooooo!